I'm happie -Janie

I decided to greet everyone I met when out walking. It was a beautiful day which made it easy to smile. Some people greet you with enthusiasm, or at the least, pleasant surprise. It's the ones that don't who intrigue me.
Being generous to them, they might be miserable for good reasons or feel unwell perhaps. When I have been depressed in the past I have avoided others and struggled to face people. What I fear the most is that some people are just downright miserable. Where I live it is usually older men who can't smile and greet others nicely. It makes me happie to interact with people and get a smile or hello back.
However I am lucky enough to live in a village, in town where hundreds of people pass by it wouldn't be so easy to greet everyone- if you did people would think you're barmy. Other rules apply so it is even harder to raise a smile in city folk. How would you get a smile or positive interaction in this case? Let us know your thoughts.

Today's "happie". A new experience -Jen

My "happie" today is that I took a Pilates reformer class for the first time.
I have tried Pilates before, but with Pilates reformer you use a bench with various equipment that adds resistance to build stronger core and tone the body.
This was an exercise that suited me very well as it was low impact, but you could definitely feel that you've had a good overall workout afterwards. Everything just feel that little bit tighter..
I think that if I keep this up alongside rebounding exercises, it will be really beneficial for my lymphoedema, as stronger, healthier muscles will help to move the lymph fluid around the body quicker.
I am already looking forward to going back for more!

Todays happie:

• Doing something I haven't done before.
• Working out, feeling my body getting stronger and healthier.

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I'm officially a "Happie" -Jen

A perfect day at home for me would be a warm summer's day, waking up to birdsong and having breakfast outside, pottering around in the garden, the kids playing and then getting together for a picnic lunch on the lawn.
I love growing my own vegetables and making family meals from home grown produce.
We also keep chickens who supply us with gorgeous tasting eggs.
Maybe I'd make a quiche and a salad, perfect picnic food..
In the evening we would have a BBQ and invite some good friends and the perfect day wouldn't end until after the stars were decorating the midnight sky.
It's nothing extravagant or expensive, and it doesn't even take any planning. its just one of those days that just "happens". But for me it's "just right"..
And I think that it's days like that you remember when the sun isn't shining..
A day like this, is for me a "happie". Something that adds to the "Feel good bank". And I think we need to make more of an effort with the "happies" in our life's.
And that is why me and Janie has taken it upon ourselves to start registering what our "happies" are, and also collect friends and families "happies". Please add your contribution in the "comments box". We are hoping to create an inspiring log to add a little happiness to everyday life.

Happie noun  /'hap.i/ Someone who tries to see or create a positive situation in everyday life.

• Making an effort to lay a beautiful dinner table.
• Take the time to notice the beauty in a stone you found on the beach.  
• Keep a photo in your purse that makes you smile every time you see it.

happie noun /'hap.i/  Something little that makes you feel effortlessly good inside.

• Stop and listen to the beautiful birdsong.
• Feel how good the spring sun feels against your skin.
• Lay in the grass and spot the shapes of the clouds.

An other of my favourite "happies" is walking bare feet on a sandy beach early in the morning whilst the sand is still cool, but the dawning sun gives a promise of a beautiful warm day.. Put your best sundress on!

Happiness -Janie

We've been thinking a lot about happiness recently, Jen has been doing the most thinking as usual but I saw a hypnotherapist recently who told me I should do one thing every day for myself.
So we plan to start writing little dots of happiness. Hopefully it might give you something to think about. If anyone has their own "moments of happiness " please, please share them with us.

To kick it off, this morning I was walking the dog when I heard some beautiful bird song. I stopped and spent five minutes gazing up at the tree the noise was coming from. I never got to spot the bird but it brightened my day. It would be so easy to forget so recording it here will remind me. Keep looking for happy stuff, it is out there.

Choosing a Secondary School -Janie

I never realized how hard it could be finding a suitable school for my daughter who has a statement of special educational needs. My son was so easy, he is a sociable boy and there was no difficultly moving him from our village primary school to our catchment secondary school. It helped that everyone in his class was going there too and it had a very good reputation. A no-brainer really.
With K it is a totally different kettle of fish.

I shouldn't really complain, we are lucky that there is so much choice and no really bad schools. I know in some places there is no choice at all and only mediocre education. Too much choice can be a terrible thing though!

I should start by explaining that my daughter is handicapped by her anxiety which is why she is statemented to begin with. She has great social skills, always behaves at school and is a bright spark although very behind academically in some areas because she has missed so much school over the years. Unfortunately though, her level of anxiety is over the top and she worries about the slightest thing, often things that seem stupid to most people.

To begin with we had at least four possible schools but it was fairly easy to strike two off the list. My husband teaches at one and felt that it would be difficult for both of them if she was at the same school. The second school we struck off the list was our catchment school. This was because K's peer group in our village started at the school in September but K has gone back a year at primary to help her catch up a bit on what she has missed. When she becomes a year 7 all the children that she started primary school with will be year 8. She doesn't like the idea of this and thinks she would be teased by the other kids about it.

I decided the best thing was to visit the two remaining schools by myself first. School A looks wonderful and the students giving the guided tour were lovely. Every class seemed to be working quietly and there was an atmosphere of calm. Sounds great, but... I didn't click with the learning support staff. They didn't sound very optimistic about her chances of settling well and even suggested that we look at a specialist independent school in Cambridge, The Red Balloon Learner Centre.
Without an attempt at a mainstream secondary school first, I don't think we have a cat-in-hells chance of the local authority paying for a place at an independent school.

School B is very run down looking and on the up rather than at the top of its game. It is a victim of not being so good in the past so many parents are choosing alternative, better performing schools. This unfortunately means most kids in K's school will not go to school B despite it being the catchment school. What worries us as parents is that only the families who can't be bothered to look around will be sending their kids there. As my husband is a teacher he is very familiar with the 'Don't care about education' families- they are the parents who never come to Parents Evening but are the ones the teachers most need to see. School B is not as impressive as School A and offers a lot less choice in the curriculum and  extra-curricular activities, but.... the learning support team seemed so much more nurturing and familiar with children with similar difficulties to K.

So my husband and I spent hours trying our best to predict the future- which school should we choose? In the end it was fairly straightforward, we chose the school we thought it would be easier to get K into in the mornings. She came with me to look at both. She said she liked School A but the following morning told me she didn't like 'the ladies' of the learning support team. When we visited School B she came away smiling and immediately said that was where she wanted to go, she felt safer there. It is usually best to trust your intuition especially when your child agrees with it!Will it be the best choice? I don't know yet, but nothing is forever, if it doesn't work out there will be other options. What I do know is that K has made enormous progress in the last 10 months and who knows how different things might be in another10 months. Janie x

Banana and Walnut Cake -Janie

I am going away for a few days and had some old bananas to use up, what a great excuse to make my favourite banana loaf cake!

Ingredients

175g plain flour
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp bicarbonate of soda
1/2 tsp salt
125g melted butter
150g golden caster sugar
2 large eggs
1 tsp vanilla essence
4 small (or 2 large) bananas
100g walnut pieces
100g sultanas

 Fan Oven at 170 degrees

Method

1. Put the oven on to warm up.
2. Mix all dry ingredients (except the sultanas and nuts) in one bowl.
3. Melt the butter and add sugar and vanilla essence, mix well.
4. Mash the bananas and add to the butter mixture.
5. Crack the eggs into the wet mixture and combine well.
6. Add the flour a tablespoon at a time and mix well after adding each spoonful.
7. Add the nuts and sultanas and combine.
8. Pour into a large loaf tin lined with baking parchment.
9. Bake for 1 hour, or until well risen and a skewer comes out clean.
10. Cool in the tin then eat! 

This cake is really forgiving if you want to make changes such as leaving out sultanas or nuts, I used to make it with dairy free spread and it tastes just as good. I've never tried but I bet chocolate chips would be great too. Let us know how you get on,
Janie x

Half gone already..

Butternut squash soup, with a hint of Asia -Jen

This soup will warm both your body and your soul on a chilly autumn evening.

Serves 4


Ingredients

• 2 medium butternut squash
• 1 yellow onion
• 1-2 garlic gloves
• 500ml hot vegetable stock
• 300ml coconut cream
• Olive oil
• Cayenne pepper, a small pinch
• 1 tsp. turmeric
• 1 tsp. coriander seeds, crushed
• Sea salt
• Fresh coriander (Cilantro)

Method

1. Preheat the oven to 200C
2. Cut the squash into large chunks and toss in large roasting tin with a generous glug of olive oil. Roast for 30 minutes until soft, turning occasionally.
3. Whilst the squash is in the oven, slice the onion and sweat in a pan until soft. Add garlic and spices.
4. When the squash is done, pop it into the pan and add the coconut cream (leaving some for decoration) and half the stock.
5. Mix with a stick blender until smooth, adding the rest of the stock until the soup has reached your preferred thickness. Season to taste.
6. Pour into bowls and decorate with a drizzle of coconut cream (you might want to thin the cream with a little water or stock) and some freshly chopped coriander leafs.

Enjoy!

Jen xx